Eyes With Fire Will See Light Everywhere

In the closing lines of the story "What we talk about when we talk about love"  Raymond Carver  says: I  could hear my heart beating. I could hear everyone's heart. I could hear the human noise we sat there making, not one of us moving, not even when the room went dark. When we read the book, its about finding that heart beating.It has been long time, I felt like that after reading a book : deeply connected, tears after reading it, completely satisfied, joy in the face, feeling human again. The other day, I felt similar emotion after watching the movie "Begin again". Best songs I have heard in recent times, best music, best performances, best screenplay. Thanks   John Carney for making me cry and writing/directing such a subtle story. PS: After watching the movie, I felt like going to Newyork again. (The movie is completely shot at NY downtown)

I worked with lot of competent and courageous people (most of them were my bosses).They have great things to talk about me. It's hard for me to see those qualities with my own senses. I have been like that not sure of what I can or what I can't. Most of the people are like that. When you enter a B-school, the first thing they do is to make you run across different tools and algorithms and categorize(restrict) your strengths and weakness into different bucket based on 150-200 questions and then the career coaches try to make believe them. The end goal is to turn you from uncertainty to  certainty even if there is chance of going wrong. Why do they do that ? Simple, if you are certain in the direction you wanted to go then nurturing that wouldn't be difficult. You cannot get a man to a place where he don't know where to go.I used the output of those tools in my resume but never completely believed in them. My philosophy is that given right conditions and support anybod...

Trying to maintain control in this life is like trying to maintain control on a roller coaster ride. The ride has its own logic and is going to go its own way, regardless of how tightly you grip the bar. There is a thrill and joy in simply surrendering to the ride and fully feeling the ups and downs of it rather than fighting them. When you fight the ride, resisting what’s happening at every turn, your whole being becomes tense and anxiety. When you go with the ride, accepting what you cannot control, freedom and joy will inevitably arise. As with so many seemingly simple things in life, it is not always easy to let go, even of the things we know we can’t control. Most of us feel a great discomfort with the givens of this life, one of which is the fact that much of the time we have no control over what happens. Sometimes this awareness comes only when we have a stark encounter with this fact, and all our attempts to be in control are revealed to be unnecessary burdens.  W...

Most men and boys love driving either bikes or cars, somehow since my childhood I was afraid of driving. I was sacred to death. Not that I was afraid of death but afraid of living artificially. Somehow deep down in my head I always thought I could not handle speeds. The idea that I would be in a uncontrollable situation drove me crazy. I love to seat in the front seats of a F-1 car or with someone who drives at 140 miles/hour however my mind does not think in speeds while I am driving. It took me 12 years to ride a bicycle. I still cannot drive manually controlled bikes or cars. For me, driving a bike or car in India is not at all possible. In US,the speeds on the freeways get the shit out of me. I went to a driving school and the trainers did not leave a single day without cursing me in their minds and shouting literally while I was driving on the roads. They are not so good teachers. They did not understood me. I read lot of articles to study the phobia of driving. I felt normal w...

When we shared a vehicle I waited for you to come and pick me up every time, practicing the same questions over and over. Where do we go? What do you want? A wild thing? A companion? A husband? I will give it. I will be that. Anything. For you. Such is the way you only taught me love in the absence of it. In the end, begging. PS: Everyone else isn't you. It turns out that's a huge problem for me.

It’s 9:40 am and I’m sitting on my bed absorbing the chaos in my mind. Believe me, even I’m surprised. I’m still alive somedays. Lately you remind me of a wild thing chewing through its foot. But you are already free and I don’t know what to do except trace the twinkle in your eyes while you smile and try not to place blame.  Here is the truth: It is hard to be in love with someone who is in love someone else. I don’t know how to turn that into poetry.

My recent dating with ping pong game has taught me a good lesson. I never used to appreciated Ping pong game as I find it much difficult to hit the balls within the table space. But the more I played, the more I enjoyed it. Now every time I see a ping pong table, my hands just go for the pads. As people, we tend to have different opinions and assumptions that are mostly untested, unexperienced and never derived through proper data. For example, If someone says, I don't like playing keyboard and if we query him/her  for the reasons, they will come up with weird stuff explaining someone else opinion or a popular social belief. The most common reason is I tried it but I did not liked it. If we still probe into that reasoning,with a question, how many times you have tried?. The answer will always be around 1-2 times. As per Malcolm Galdwell, we need to practice at least 10000 hours to become expert in any given field. I agree not everyone wants to become expert but is it enough to...